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Marriage: For Better AND Worse
last updated:
Fri, 4/30/2010 9:03 AM

You may have heard the old joke: Marriage is a three ring circus - engagement ring, wedding ring and suffering.

Based on my latest internet search, let me share some numbers on marriage and divorce:

  • The probability that a man will be married by age 40 is 80%; for a woman, it is 86%.
  • The chance that a first marriage will end in divorce is 45-50%.
  • Of those first marriages ending in divorce, the probability of re-marriage is 75%.
  • Of those who re-marry the probability of another divorce is even higher (67-74%)!

My conclusion: We are apparently "wired" for marriage but our "wiring" is faulty!

As an employee assistance program counselor, this reality is evident in my day-to-day practice. Individuals and couple’s present in various stages of enchantment and disenchantment- the unmarried recovering from the latest disappointment, the married seeking first aid--but all mystified by the absence of that love story that we carry in our heads! Competent in our challenging jobs and capable of multi-tasking with our latest electronic devices, we frequently feel like we’re suffering from a learning disorder when it comes to our love lives.

Counseling is a way to clarify thoughts and feelings regarding the complicated marital relationship. A licensed EAP counselor, as a neutral party, can help you better understand the patterns and dynamics in your marriage, so that once again your marriage can be "for better."

Please give Methodist Employee Assistance Program a call for easily accessible, no cost, confidential assistance.


Wayne Hyatt has worked for Methodist LeBonheur since 1997 and as a behavioral health clinician, manager and consultant in the Memphis area for over 25 years. All opinions expressed here are those of their authors and not of their employer. Information provided here is for medical education only. It is not intended as and does not substitute for medical advice. For more information about how the Methodist Employee Assistance Program can help you, call us at 901.683.5658 or 800.880.5658.


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Methodist Healthcare is an integrated health care delivery system, dedicated to the art of healing through our faith-based commitment to minister to the whole person. 1211 Union Avenue, Memphis, Tennessee 38104 • (901) 516-7000